The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it. ~C.C. Scott
I wish there were words to describe how I’m feeling right now. Today I’m grieving for the life I lost on March 21, 2007…the day the doctors at the cancer center performed surgery, then left for vacation…leaving me in the hands of residents for eight days. Thinking about those eight days I feel anger for the negligence of those doctors and the stupidity of the residents for not listening to me.
However I made it through it all and I woke up this morning so I feel gratitude that I’m still here to take another breath. But I’m tired, exhausted and anxious not knowing if I have cancer again. I could really do without the roller coaster of emotions for one day.
How about a day full of energy? Full of happiness? Filled with family and friends? God, that would be fucking fantastic…just fantastic.
I’d even accept feeling flat…
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Tense Teacher 03.20.08 at 10:12 pm
I don’t know what to say, other than, I am so sorry.
But you do have family and friends who love you very much.
Tense Teacher’s last blog post..Happy Birthday, Littleone!
Lisa 03.20.08 at 10:23 pm
Tense, Thank you. I know I have family that loves me very much. I’m not sure how many friends I have. I’m in a weird place with my friends right now. I think I just need sleep.
Divalicious 03.20.08 at 10:28 pm
I know we don’t know each other that well but I am here for you. *hugs*
Divalicious’s last blog post..Yum?
Tug 03.20.08 at 10:55 pm
You know I’ve been reading (maybe)…I’ve commented once (maybe twice…more likely once)…I just want to say you have made ME pay attention. I actually got an appointment, went yesterday, & have labs scheduled for next week - because of YOU. YOU made me aware. I thanked you for that post…I now thank you again. Please know that you DO have friends…whether IRL, or out here in the ’sphere. I’m praying for you. I’m wishing good thoughts. I’m hoping that all you’ve fought for finds a cure.
I am here. Please know that…
Tug’s last blog post..‘Tis the Season
Colleen 03.21.08 at 1:03 am
I wish you a good night’s sleep and a day of peace. I am glad you are still here to experience the anniversary — even if it is an anniversary of the ineptness of others , it is also an anniversary of the strength of your spirit.
Avitable 03.21.08 at 2:21 pm
Maybe this is one anniversary that’s best forgotten.
I’m sorry you’re feeling down.
Avitable’s last blog post..Memes aren’t just for weekends anymore
Lisa 03.22.08 at 8:27 pm
Divalicious, Thank you so much. The kindness of strangers amazes me sometimes. I mean it’s not like I don’t know who you are…lol…you know what I mean.
Lisa 03.22.08 at 8:31 pm
Tug, I don’t know what to say other than thank GOD you were paying attention. I hope that everything is fine and that you don’t have this horrible disease but the fact that you are paying attention to the symptoms and your body are so important. Please pass that along to all of your friends, family, and every woman you know. Thank you for reminding me that I’ve forgotten to do that very thing…that used to be my purpose. Thank you for reminding me of what my purpose is.