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Three-time Cancer Fighter, Mother of Tweens, Graduate Student more...
Contact: lisaclusterfook at gmail dot com
Contact: lisaclusterfook at gmail dot com
It’s time for me to stop stressing out over this trip to Disney and over money. After all, didn’t I just post about living now and being at peace? I want both of those things back pronto. Let me just say that in yesterday’s post I wasn’t stating that anyone was angry, I was just stating that if I stepped on anyone’s proverbial toes then I was sorry, truly sorry.
Now I’d like to talk about my doctor’s appointment with the medical oncologist on Tuesday. I don’t want to through a bunch of medical crap at you so I’ll explain in the most basic terms I can because this is really fucked up.
Last year, February 2007, I had a biopsy done of the mass on my abdomen and the type of cells found weren’t the kind typically found with ovarian cancer or recurrent ovarian cancer but the report stated that “it couldn’t be ruled out.” So the doctors slapped the diagnosis “RECURRENT OVARIAN CANCER” on my forehead and insisted that’s what I had.
My family doctor and gynecologist/cousin were two voices of reason who said, “hmm, that doesn’t make sense…” However not being oncologists they told me that I should go to a gynecology oncologist and at no time did any gynecology oncologist tell me that it wasn’t recurrent ovarian cancer.
When I had surgery at…gasp…Fox Chase Cancer Center in Philadelphia…gasp…yes, the place that tried to kill me…they never followed up with a letter, a phone call, nothing. They never suggest chemotherapy, never told me if I actually had recurrent ovarian cancer and basically dropped the ball. DROPPED. THE. BALL.
So, for the past year I’ve been of the thought that I had recurrent ovarian cancer and didn’t need chemotherapy. I’ve thought that every thing is fine because a world renowned cancer center would have contacted me after their board of certified oncologists reviewed my case, right?
Not so much.
Even better is that when I was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2004 the tumor I had was a borderline low malignant potential tumor. That’s a tumor that has the potential to become cancer and in my case was cancer however it took three hospitals to make the diagnosis. I wonder today if any of them had it right because all three opinions were different.
Can you say, “fucked up”?
Better yet? Borderline low malignant potential tumors…rarely ever come back and when they do it’s not in the form of cancer that I had last year NOR is it as aggressive as the kind of cancer I have now.
I knew all of this information before I met with the oncologist on Tuesday and then he confirmed every thing I knew from the research I did. It was a beautiful thing, yet extremely tragic.
The medical oncologist has a theory that I may not have recurrent ovarian cancer at all but something completely different…except, he isn’t sure what it is. It could be colon cancer, gastrointestinal cancer, lung cancer, breast cancer…some kind of aggressive cancer that is spreading to other organs. The remaining questions are: where else is this cancer and just how bad is it?
Right now we have no idea what kind of cancer we are dealing with and won’t know until I have a full body CT scan and a fuckton of blood work. I’ll have to start chemotherapy and after three rounds I’ll have another full body CT scan and another fuckton of blood work to see if there are any changes. Hopefully that will help diagnose what kind of cancer I have to better treat it.
The doctor thinks that I’ve actually had this cancer much longer than any of us think especially based on the size of the tumor found on my abdomen last year which was 4 inches. This is why he wants to start chemotherapy immediately.
When I explained how important it was to take my children to Disney World he completely understood. He said, “Take your babies now while you still can but do it quickly because we need to take care of you fast!”
I have a full body CT Scan scheduled for next Friday. Depending on those results I may have to go through a round of chemotherapy before I go Disney World.
Of course we made our plans for the trip and then found out that our medical coverage changed as of January 1, 2008. We are responsible for the first $3,000 of coverage each year before our insurance pays 100%…we pay 10%, they pay 90%. That $150 co-pay I thought I had for my biopsy last week? OUCH, HURT ME…I got a bill for $294.35.
Live and learn…but fuck it. I’m taking my children to Disney World.
The hospital will have to get in line, take $10 a month until I can pay it off. I’m tired of paying every bill on time, living on nothing while every other asshole went out there and bought a house they couldn’t afford. I live in a tiny little house with three people. That’s just a rant for another time…
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